Welcome Back to Life: Likely Fiction Part II

Long time no write! I've been on a hiatus as life has been extremely busy providing me with plenty of excuses to put off writing as I try to get a handle on the direction of my life for myself and my family. A few updates for those who may be curious: 1. I've been working from home now for 15 months (basically since March 2020 when the NBA has its abrupt shutdown). 2. During our time working from home, a little magic happened and my wife became pregnant with our 2nd daughter. She was born in February 2021 and is nearing the 3 month mark of her wonderful life. We call her smiley girl because she is always smiling and has been very attentive to make eye contact and interact since the day she was born. 3. With our youngest being around 3 months, and our oldest creeping up on becoming a 4 year old, we decided that we needed to get them both in daycare to try and bring back some normalization to our life. My oldest is extremely excited and my youngest is such a chill baby that I know she will see this as a new adventure for her to experience. 4. The wifey is having some struggles with going back to work and not spending 24/7 with her babies but she is a strong woman and has been mentally equipping herself to get back to the grind so we can continue to save towards the goals we have established as a family. 5. I've started writing a book! While I have been blatantly silent on this blog for quite some time, I am spending alot of my energy towards a fiction novel that I hope to start dropping previews on soon on my site. It is one of the ambitious projects I've ever pursued and will definitely be a multi year task to complete but it is something I've wanted to write for many years and finally found the words. Make sure and follow me on twitter at @Coltonblack15 for more updates in that arena as I am very active on that platform. I'll do my best to start sharing more on this blog and bring it back to life as it serves as a great place for me to speculate about my own internal battles and struggles and share in a very lucid, transparent way in order to better understand myself and my own journey. I hope that in being so honest and straight forward, that others might be inspired to converse about their own walks through life. Please feel free to comment on this blog as I'd be happy to communicate and hear from anyone who finds themselves reading my words. So that pretty much catches you up on what is important in my life at this moment. I wanted to take a bit of time to reflect on the last 1.5 years as the world has been shaken to its core by COVID-19. My wife and I both made it a point to get our vaccines and have been feeling more comfortable living a normal life as we try to balance our own needs and desires with those of our family and friends who are eager to spend time with us. It can be challening to say no to hang out opportunities or family get togethers, but we are learning that our time is our own and the only way to secure our own life is to be willing to assert our power over our own time. Time is so fleeting and the years come and go with ease as we age. I'm 29 years old now and my wife is 30. Still in our prime right?! It feels as though we are and I want to soak in every second and ensure that I'm constantly pushing myself forward to be a better father, husband, and human being. The tough fact of life of parenthood is if you want your kids to not only hear you, but listen, then you've got to be willing to exemplify the lessons you teach them through your own life and how you choose to live it. So we are working each day to be a little better at controlling our own anxiety and re-routing our thoughts to a place rooted in positivity and optimism. We are blessed to have wonderful jobs that pay decently and allow us to excel as individuals in areas of interest. I have moments where I fall off the proverbial horse and am not the model that I need to be for my girls, but at the end of the day, I remind myself that my parents weren't the picture of perfection either, and yet I still have an abundance of love in my heart for them and the memories that we made together through my childhood. In the span of the past 15 months, I've spent more time building things as a way to expend energy in a health way. I started small, building a squirrel feeder for our backyard. As I learned more about wood working I took on bigger projects, such as our bookshelf in the living room that I built before lumber prices skyrocketed. And in the last 2 months, I've spent countless weekends working with a family friend who is a fantastically skilled laboror, on building a covered back porch patio. I don't know what it is about using your hands to construct something, but it gives me alot of life and I love it because it shows my oldest daughter what can be accomplished when one sticks to a plan and executes. My hope now is to fall back into my healthy writing habit, and become more active on this blog again. Oh how I love to get my thoughts onto paper and contemplate the journey that I've found myself on. If you had asked 21 year old me if I'd have my own house, 2 kids, a beautiful wife and a strong, blossoming career by 30 then I'd probably would've chuckled at the idea. Yet here I am, working to fill the shoes of what I believe a Dad should be. Life is hard and life is unfair. I think COVID-19 taught that lesson to us all in one way or another. I hope that you have been spared any injury or sickness during these tumultous times and I pray that we can continue to interact and learn from each other on this site! I'll end with a quote from my favorite movie of all time, Interstellar: "We used to look up at the sky and wonder at our place in the stars... now we just look down and worry about our place in the dirt." Never stop dreaming! Never stop staring up at the stars and allowing them to put your own worries and troubles into perspective. Never stop learning and never let anyone tell you that you aren't capable of what you feel possible in your very soul. Cheers and have a wonderful month of May! Colton

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